What does 'normal' newborn sleep actually look like?

If you’ve recently welcomed a new baby, congratulations! I hope you’re finding time to look after yourself as well as your gorgeous, beautiful-smelling, scrunched-up ball of incredible-ness!

Before we get stuck in, let me introduce myself!

I’m Nadia, a Baby, Child and Autism Sleep Coach based in Staffordshire. I’m a Wife and Mum to my 5 year old twins and 1 year old baby - it’s a busy house! I work with families all over the world who want better sleep but still want to stay present and responsive. I help make positive changes without sleep training so you can improve sleep without giving up the things that matter most to you.

In this blog, I’m going to delve into newborn sleep and what it looks like - exploring what’s normal and when to seek extra support.

In the last days or weeks you’ve probably asked yourself at some point:

“Is this normal?”

Are you experiencing…

●      Baby waking up frequently

●      Baby only having short naps

●      Baby only settling when held

●      Baby sleeping all day but awake all night

●      Baby won’t nap in their moses basket

●      Baby not waking up to feed overnight

Newborn sleep can look very different for every baby and it’s often completely different to what we were expecting.

Newborn sleep is irregular (and that’s completely normal)

It can take a few weeks for your baby to develop their circadian rhythm (their body clock) so sleep is driven by sleep pressure (not light/dark cycles). Therefore, sleep is spread across the whole 24-hour period. With this in mind, newborn sleep can look like a series of naps throughout the day and over night (rather than structured naps and night time sleep).

Plus, newborns don’t start making melatonin and cortisol (key hormones for regular rhythmic sleep) until they are around 6 to 8 weeks old.

Most newborns will sleep anywhere between 14–17 hours in 24 hours, but this can happen in short bursts rather than long stretches (or in longer stretches straight away). The way a newborn sleeps is completely individual and there is no one-size-fits-all sleeping pattern. If your baby is sleeping on the lower end of that average (i.e. around 14 hours in 24 hours) that is a normal amount of sleep for their age. Likewise, if they’re on the higher end of that scale, that is also normal.

Frequently waking overnight

One of the biggest surprises for new parents is just how often newborns wake. My twins would switch! I’d settle one and then within seconds, the other one would wake.

It’s very common for babies to wake every 1.5–3 hours, and sometimes even more frequently. This is because:

●      Their tummies are tiny and need regular feeding

●      If your baby was premature, they may need feeding little and often

●      They spend more time in lighter sleep

●      Waking helps protect them (like a safety mechanism)

You’re not doing anything wrong if your baby isn’t sleeping for long stretches yet… It just means your baby is behaving like a newborn.

 

Short naps

Newborn naps can be completely unpredictable and often quite short. You just sit down with a hot cup of tea and boom, baby starts to stir.

Naps lasting anywhere from 20 minutes to a few hours, with no pattern, is normal. One day your baby may sleep an hour in the morning but the following day at the same time they may only sleep 20 minutes. Understanding that there isn’t really structure or a schedule at this point can be really helpful because it takes the pressure off you to ‘get it right’.

Every day can look different in terms of how long your baby has slept for and how many naps they have had. Forget wake windows, forget building a rod for your own back, forget strict bedtime routines - these things really don’t matter when it comes to newborn sleep.

With this in mind, if your baby needs lots of support to fall asleep (rocking, feeding, holding) you are not going to make things difficult for yourself.

Contact naps and feeding your baby to sleep are both normal. Many babies feel safest and most settled when they’re close to you which is why they calm almost immediately when they’re in your arms. They can smell you and hear your voice. You are their safe place.

Contact naps are also a brilliant way to ensure that you get rest too. Nap times aren’t for tidying the kitchen or doing some washing - they’re for you to have a chill out too so stick on your favourite show or read a good book and smell your baby’s head…the kitchen can wait.

If your baby is contact napping, staying awake is important. Check out safe sleep guidelines for more advice on making sure your baby is safe when sleeping.

Quick nap fact: naps don’t need to be in the dark! We don’t create much melatonin in the day so falling asleep in the dark won’t help your baby fall asleep or stay asleep for longer. Darkness for naps is only helpful if you have a FOMO baby who needs a darker environment to sleep without distraction.

Only settling to sleep when held

If your baby doesn’t settle when lying in their moses basket or cot and they only settle when you’re holding them - that’s normal too. They have spent months in a warm, cosy and constantly moving environment so they are adjusting to the outside world. Some babies take longer to adjust than others.

It’s not a “bad habit”. You have found a sure-fire way of settling your baby to sleep, which is great.

Another reason your baby may be falling asleep being held or upright is because you have been told they have reflux and holding them upright can reduce discomfort. Reflux is the involuntary bringing up of milk during or after feeds and is very common in babies under 8 weeks due to an immature muscle at the top of the stomach. It does resolve and will get more manageable but can feel especially overwhelming and difficult in those early days. If you’re finding this particularly tricky or suspect your baby has reflux please contact your healthcare professional for more advice.

Baby not waking up to feed overnight

While frequent waking is very normal for newborns, some babies will sleep for longer stretches, occasionally even skipping a wake-up overnight.

This can sometimes leave parents wondering:

“Should I be waking them?” or “Is this okay?”

In many cases, the answer is yes, this can be completely normal too.

Some newborns are naturally sleepier, particularly in the early weeks. If your baby is feeding well, gaining weight appropriately and your healthcare professional is happy, then longer stretches of sleep can simply be part of your baby’s individual pattern.

That said, in the early days (especially before your baby has regained their birth weight) you may be advised to wake them for feeds.

If you’re unsure, it’s best to check with your midwife or healthcare professional for guidance specific to your baby.

Short awake time

Newborns can only stay awake for short periods, in the early weeks this could be as little as 30 minutes before drifting back off to sleep. But, it’s important to note that your baby may be able to stay awake for much longer than this, which is also normal.

If your baby becomes fussy or unsettled quickly, this may be a sign they’re ready for sleep or that they’re ready for a new toy, a different song or something new to explore.

Your baby will sleep when their sleep pressure reaches its peak. If they’re not ready to sleep, you’ll have a fight on your hands.

 

Newborn sleep is about connection

If your baby isn’t following a routine, isn’t sleeping long stretches or only settles on you or your partner, you’re not alone and more importantly - you’re not doing anything wrong.

Newborn sleep isn’t about routines or independence. It’s about adjustment, connection, and meeting your baby where they are.

The first few months of your baby’s sleep is literally like a rollercoaster, it’s ever-changing. If you’re in the thick of it now, it can feel intense. Try to take the pressure off and go with the flow because you’ll find it a much easier ride (emotionally).

Lean on your support system if you can and say “yes!” when offerings of help come in. Hand over a list of little jobs that you’d like doing when someone pops round for a newborn cuddle... one cuddle = one helpful job! If this feels tricky in the moment, set the expectation before visitors come i.e. “it would be great if you could help with washing some bottles when you come round to see baby”.

And when you’re ready to have your baby back in your arms, it’s absolutely OK to say “I need her back now”. I wish I had done this more, especially in the first few days. You need those newborn cuddles, just as much as your baby needs you.

When will sleep start to change?

Your baby will move out of newborn sleep patterns and move into adult sleep patterns between 3 and 5 months. This change in sleep architecture is often known as “the 4 month sleep regression”.

This regression is the only evidence based regression (so ignore all the BS the algorithm sends your way when your baby is about 8 months!) because a baby’s sleep is biologically changing. Their sleep shifts from two newborn sleep states to more adult-like patterns (light sleep, deep sleep, and REM).

Once your baby is through this period, you can build in routine and start having a more structured daily schedule.

More support

I hope you have found this blog helpful. If you do have any questions my DMs are open and I’m always happy to help where I can. You can find plenty more sleep advice on my Instagram @sunrisesleepcoach so head over there and give me a follow!

If you’re past newborn sleep, struggling with sleep challenges and seeking support - we can have a free, no obligation call to chat through your options.

Written by Nadia Austin - Baby, Child and Autism Sleep Coach

Website - https://www.sunrisesleepcoach.com/